LISTEN WITH THE EARS OF YOUR HEART!

This day is filled with opportunities for celebration. It might seem tempting to focus on only one. If we quietly allow ourselves to ponder, we might gain a wider perspective that allows us to include all three: Mother’s Day, the Ascension of the Lord, and World Communications Day.

We begin by looking at each individually. Mother’s Day. I offer a bit of history. When long distance calls were made through telephone operators, it was necessary to staff the call centre at its highest level on Mother’s Day. That day, there were always more long-distance calls than any other day of the year. The desire to connect with our mothers was especially strong, even when it was not possible to be present in person.

The celebration of the Ascension of the Lord would have been a truly bittersweet experience. On one hand, there would have been a sense of gratitude for Jesus’ post-resurrection time, and the meaningful experiences the disciples shared with him. On the other hand, the pain of losing him again. Jesus would no longer be physically present.

And when the sense of awe settled down, the chance to ponder that Jesus had promised to send the Holy Spirit as guide and advocate. There would be something more than ‘radio silence. For sure, it would take time to learn to communicate in this new way. Done well, with care and attention, it would be possible to carry out the mission that had been left to them. And it was not a small task.

“Go into all the world and proclaim the good news to the whole creation.” [Mark16.15] The first World Communications Day! An injunction to use our communication skills for our collective well-being and the greatest good for all creation.

How do we do that? What does that look like? When should we do that? Obviously, we cannot all be proclaiming to one another at the same time. That would be chaos. We have to take turns. We must also listen. We must have ears to hear. We learn to listen in a particular way. St. Benedict, in the time-tested Rule of Benedict, offers this wise invitation:

“Listen with the ears of your heart.“

That is a deeper listening. Among other things, it is a careful listening for what is under the surface of the words being spoken. We also notice the volume and the tone of voice, the quiver of emotion, the look on the face, the carriage of the body, the words hinted at, and the words left unspoken. These are the things our moms were often exceptionally good at “sussing out,” even when we tried to hide our true feelings.

There are times when the love in a mother’s heart remains almost hidden. I recall a time when I had the privilege to be with, and to listen to, women who were losing custody of their newborn babies. It was usually because of the illness of some kind of addiction. And yet, when given the chance to speak, these moms sounded just like all the moms who were going home with their babies. They all wanted what was best for their children. The illness made it difficult for anyone to hear the love their hearts intended to communicate. I have yet to meet a mother who is free of guilt, regret, or sorrow for the things they wish they had done differently. And yet, when given a chance, their love comes alive, often accompanied by tears. It is the very language most of us find hardest of all to hear. The tears of joy, regret, delight, pride, sorrow, and hope emerge in the wordless expression that is characteristic of the language of the heart. Our hearts speak the words we cannot. Mysteriously, universally, there is understanding.

Brenda Merk Hildebrand has a deep passion for lifelong learning, education, and spiritual and palliative care. She appreciates the opportunities that have come her way to share life’s transforming journey with others: one-with-one, through intentional group settings, in animating workshops and retreats, and by way of her writing. Brenda is a long-time contributor to Living with Christ.